Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Too much time on my hands

I find myself lately with not only the time to pursue extracurricular (i.e., non-baby and child-care) activities, but also the time to feel angst about them. I'm sure this is extremely stupid of me. I mean, I should be so grateful to have any extra time at all, right? Especially when compared with my life this time last year, working nearly around the clock in a busy bakery, making Thanksgiving pies for the masses WHILE PREGNANT. It truly sucked and I'm glad to be done with that life.

But has anyone looked at my profile? I threw "gin cocktails" into my interests so that I didn't come across as truly square, but really my interests are thoroughly domestic. I've taken up quilting as of last year and absolutely love it. I'm interested in sewing in general, in fact, especially stuff for the house. I love to bake. I love to cook. I love to have people over to feed them. I love gardening. I basically love all things associated with being at home. I've even gone through phases of home-canning, soap-making, and a brief fling with knitting, for chrissakes! I don't think I'm alone if Martha Stewart's billion dollar empire means anything, but still it's hard to make all these sorts of hobbies sound interesting to anyone else, at a cocktail party for example. Throw "stay-at-home mom" into the conversation and pretty shortly I'm the biggest wallflower present. Just a couple of days ago I attended a workshop sponsored by my neighborhood gardening club (See?) on decorating for the holidays (See? See?!). If it weren't for the fact that 2 of the presenters were young, stereotypically flamboyant gay men I would've felt completely old-fashioned, surrounded as I was by every little old lady this side of Durham. My interests do tend toward the old-ladyish it would seem. Everytime I walk into my favorite local quilt store it is quite noticably devoid of anyone my age.

I asked Husband recently if I was tending too alarmingly towards the domestic sphere, if he was worried that instead of a modern, enlightened young woman he found that he had in fact married Laura Ingalls Wilder. He gave me a typically honest answer to the effect that as long as I had interests that I was excited about I was still an exciting person. If I were to lose interest in any sort of hobby, well, that apparently would be a different story. So I guess I shouldn't beat myself up about what truly are my interests. Once upon a time, I had fantasies of being so uber-competent that I could literally produce anything I needed to live in my life--growing and preserving food, raising animals, making clothes and bed linens, even building houses. I guess it's not so surprising then that given a little extra time I'm getting back into those old hobbies. But I just wish I was more interesting at cocktail parties.

5 comments:

theyellowwallpaper said...

Wow...You are quite an impressive woman. I say celebrate you domestic engineer you!

That is a much better existance then those of us who can't shake the feeling that we're a triangle trying to fit into a circle slot.

Sugarmama said...

Ooh, "domestic engineer?" I like it!

Piece of Work said...

Hey, at least you have interests. Or, at least you are good at the things you have interest in. I love to cook, but I suck at it. Other than that? I am just interested in lying around. Doesn't make for scintillating cocktail party conversation either.

Mommygoth said...

Slime, really. This blog has been a huge insight into your little sugarmama brain for me - you almost never let us girls into these weird little fears you have. I could list here all of the things over the years that I have witnessed that would cement your position as "not boring" forever, but as you were naked in a few of those, I think I should probably abstain (and no, anyone else reading, that doesn't mean what you think it means).

None of us think of your cooking and baking as domestic because what you can do in the kitchen is too close to an art form to qualify as "domestic" or a "hobby". And you didn't think of it that way either when you got paid for it - nothing is different other than that!

And the other stuff is really much more about interior decorating and presentation if you choose to look at it that way - you make quilts that are beautiful, not just functional, and your house is full of interesting, lovely things. And the last cocktail party I was bloody AT, girl, was at your house, roundabout Christmas last year. As I recall, you were working the crowd, pregnant as you were. Husband is right - you have interests, and that is part of what makes you interesting - you're always doing something new. When you will get boring is when you stagnate - I haven't seen any evidence of you doing that. If I do, I'll swat you, good.

Moonface said...

until i read this post, i didnt realise that practically all my interests listed on blogger profile are of the domestic variety. but hey, i'm a domestic engineer (i just love that term) and i reckon we should be celebrating the fact that we have diverse (albeit domestic) interests.