Friday, December 29, 2006

Cozy suburban vision meets bitchy mama reality

Do any of you suburban, SAHM types have this sweet little vision of having the neighborhood go-to house like I do? You all know what I'm talking about, right? The house in the neighborhood where the rooms all have interesting stuff to play with or look at, the backyard has swings and toys and other good stuff, there are pets to chase, crafts to do, the homemade cookies flow like wine, etc? Some part of me wants our new house to be that house. Some part of me very much likes the idea of having a house full of kids that I can play mama hen to and that Bean and Sister can play with until it's time to send everyone home to their grateful parents. I want the neighborhood kids to be comfortable here, to think of me as a nice mom, to have this house be a lovely, cozy backdrop to my kids' childhood that they'll remember fondly when they're adults. Nice image, huh?

So when a neighbor lady called up a little while ago to ask if her 2 bored, out-of-school kids could come over to play for a few hours because she wasn't feeling well, I should've been all sweetness and light and getting out the plate of cookies 'cause here was a chance to live my nice neighborhood mama vision! I wasn't. To the mom I said yes, of course they could come over and I was sorry she didn't feel well and if she wanted they could have lunch here while she napped and Sister would love to see them and yada yada yada. But when I hung up I fumed quietly to myself, even as I recognized that Sister would probably snap out of her own out-of-school funk if she had someone besides Bean to play with. All I could think, though, was, "They better fuckin' all like grilled cheese and baby carrots for lunch. I better not hear any babies screaming because they're feeling left out, dammit. No one better fight..." and so on.

Just call me the neighborhood bitch.


Nikkie said...

That same thing would have gone through my mind. I think that every single time I agree to watch my niece.

Mama D said...

I guess I never imagine myself or my home to be that way.

My coworker called me a few weeks ago at 8:00 am asking if her two year old son could come over for a couple of hours because her babysitter was sick and her mom (who doesn't work and is ALWAYS available, must be nice) had an appointment she couldn't miss. I said "Sure, no problem." but then I secretly thought, shit, now I won't be able to get anything done.

It ended up being fine. He was a good boy and played well with A. I didn't get anything done though and when I got to work later that day I found myself expecting his mom to be ever so grateful and kissing my butt and so on but it didn't happen. In fact I got the impression that she figured it was no big deal for me because I just sat around on my big arse when I wasn't working and had nothing better to do than look after her kid.

Hmmm. I sound bitchy too. Guess I'm the neighborhood bitch as well. We should be friends.

So, I'm dying to know. Did they like the grilled cheese and baby carrots?

Belle said...

Heh, I am like that, too. I want that, yet I'm rarely in the mood for it. Then when it does happen, my kids are usually much better behaved than when it's just them, so I am grateful for the diversion. But I'm definitely more bitch than suburban vision.

Beth said...

look at you...posting so much! thank you!

ya, I always wanted the "nice house" and to be the "nice mom"...but screw it, I get tired of other people's kids just as fast as I do my own...and if their own parents don't want 'em around, why the hell would I?